Dog days

When you get a dog, about the first thing you want to do is buy doggy items, collars, blankets, a ball etc. But I've noticed a hitch which is a big cliché lately.

It's difficult to buy a collar at a local shop, or vet unless you're the owner of one of those ridiculous little furballs which you could practically swallow whole, one of those dogs who are supposed to be great for the elderly or for kids, but also yap nonstop at anything that probably isn't a burglar all day and all night.

Being the owner of a Malamute, a snow dog, with feet the size of a hairy mammoth, I find these twee collars for bite sized pooches an affront.

Why is it that large dog owners are being forgotten about? There are people around our way who actually own Labradors, Alsations and other large breeds, Surely those who push doggie products want our money too?

But no, Go into a supermarket pet area and try to find items for large dogs, usually the largest collar you'll get will fit a neck about the size of a wallnut.

Wolfie!

The question

Imagine, if you will, an alternate universe where you could buy body parts at vendors like you can in Secondlife.

In this world. when a boy turns sixteen, he's legally allowed to own a fully functional penis.

So three friends offer to buy you one for your birthday/

A Straight friend, A Gay friend, and a Girlfriend.

Who's the best bet for the right one, as far as you're concerned?

* Once you put it on, you can't swap it over without surgery, it becomes part of your body... but you have an hour in which you can change your mind.


My feelings are: That the straight friend might buy you a good one, but it might be smaller than his.

The Girlfriend would probably buy you a good one, but would she be thinking about you or her when buying it?

I think the gay friend would buy the best one of all, and I'm not talking about size, since I've seen large, but very ugly penises on people [guys mainly].

So I'd trust him with this one.

Others... Your Dad? Great, Because Most dads want their son's to be complete studs and they like to say things like "He takes after his dad".

That guy from the church... no way, you'd get some shrivelled up pink thing about the size of the tip of your little finger.

I wouldn't want one from that guy who's into Anime, You'd end up with one like a tentacle, but then I suppose at least the prehensile nature of it could hang onto your keys when you're juggling with groceries.

McDonalds, Supersize me?

Subway, A foot long for $5?

Ideas?

Wolfie!

After the party

So I did Rockit, and We had that fantastic Komuso concert last night... then it was time for bed. The Kitty and Puppy want snacks before bed, so I gave them what they wanted, and then Kate wanted to go out... well that's ok.

Then I heard crunching a few minutes later, it turned out that it wasn't a pee that she wanted, it was her bone that she'd stuck in a hole days ago.

You can't seperate a huge malamute from their bone, so I just let her go.

I switched on ABC and watched the last of an old war film from England, and hoped Kate would be finished... but no, she was crunching away at it for ages.

When she finally finished, it was about 2:45am.

Why do they always want their bones in the middle of the night?

I got to bed but I was too hyper anyway from the stuff I'd done on Secondlife. Everything went very very well and I can see us having more music there from now on.

Congrats to Simon, Lilli, Juko, Katisha and Artfox... If I've left out anyone, I appologise... Komuso too, He was amazing.

I've started using twitter, so now I need to divide my time between here, facebook, secondlife and... oh I must have something else I've forgotten ;)

Wolfie!

Secondlife quotes #2

After sending a friend a gesture:

[6:44] Friend 1: Is it just me, or does everyone else see "Gesture from Wolfie Rankin" and get nervous?
[6:44] Friend 2: hehehe
[6:44] Friend 1: Hmmm, maybe I should have said that differently?
[6:44] Wolfie Rankin: dave gave it to me
[6:44] Wolfie Rankin: so it's double
[6:45] Friend 4: that makes us feel even more nervous
[6:45] Friend 1 checks to see if I am in a private place...
[6:45] Wolfie Rankin: well it's not the one with the lube and the pumpkin
[6:46] Friend 5: hehe
[6:47] Friend 1: well THAT makes me feel SO much more confidant!

The gesture actually stretches your neck to about the size of your whole avatar.

Friend: "Wolfie looks good up there"
Wolfie: Yes, I can pick up SBS from here.

Wolfie!

Baaa

Strange men do weird things to sheep.

Grieving

Last night, I finally began to grieve for Mum.

I lost her in 2006, due to a lung condition which we were unable to solve before time ran out. She'd got me through many things including an incredibly difficult birth, which She'd remind me of on each birthday, Whooping cough which almost killed me as a child, She'd cleaned up my blood when I'd had accidents and finally She saw me through my chemotherapy.

When She died, I couldn't comprehend it, I wasn't sad, I couldn't cry. I allowed myself to, but it wouldn't come.

Mum was so very close to me, and such a great cog in my life that when she went, I went numb, because I couldn't see how great the loss was.

I felt as though a great wall or mountain was up against my nose.

As with Dad, I had a dream, but far more complex.

For ages now, I have dreamt of my parents being alive or sick or dead, it's been very confusing. Last night even, I thought Mum was dead and yet Dad was alive.

Icons in the dream included Me finding an old mans' musty jacket in the guttter and having to wear it for some reason.

My Dad having lots of money, and his Boss trying to swindle some of it back.
[in real life his Boss was nice to him].

a bitterly cold evening, where the wind blew through my gas heater and My old dog sitting out the front, in the cold [Malamute] and the gate was wide open,
yet he remained with me.

Then of Mum and I, sitting in the street, I was almost naked except for underwear, but wasn't concerned.

I could hear a woman singer, and it was though My Mother was suggesting she's the one who will enter my life and make things better. I'm a loner and I really don't want anything to do with dating or marriage, yet there was joy in this part of the dream which took the hurt away.

A person sent me a letter, expressing their sorrow for me "I've lost my Mum too" it said. and there was a short poem that seemed to be penned by Terry Pratchet or Dr Seuss.

And then suddenly I felt the loss and began to weep in my dream, and then woke.

I'll take today as it comes, I'm not sure what the effect will be, but I'm glad that finally there's been something.

Wolfie!

Giant caterpillar found in Australia