23 March, 2009

The question

Imagine, if you will, an alternate universe where you could buy body parts at vendors like you can in Secondlife.

In this world. when a boy turns sixteen, he's legally allowed to own a fully functional penis.

So three friends offer to buy you one for your birthday/

A Straight friend, A Gay friend, and a Girlfriend.

Who's the best bet for the right one, as far as you're concerned?

* Once you put it on, you can't swap it over without surgery, it becomes part of your body... but you have an hour in which you can change your mind.

My feelings are: That the straight friend might buy you a good one, but it might be smaller than his.

The Girlfriend would probably buy you a good one, but would she be thinking about you or her when buying it?

I think the gay friend would buy the best one of all, and I'm not talking about size, since I've seen large, but very ugly penises on people [guys mainly].

So I'd trust him with this one.

Others... Your Dad? Great, Because Most dads want their son's to be complete studs and they like to say things like "He takes after his dad".

That guy from the church... no way, you'd get some shrivelled up pink thing about the size of the tip of your little finger.

I wouldn't want one from that guy who's into Anime, You'd end up with one like a tentacle, but then I suppose at least the prehensile nature of it could hang onto your keys when you're juggling with groceries.

McDonalds, Supersize me?

Subway, A foot long for $5?



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